Monday, March 11, 2013

Sleep Deprivation

Discovery Health cites these top 10 signs of sleep deprivation:

10. Inability to handle stress
9. Poor memory
8. Inability to concentrate
7. Increased appetite
6. Vision problems
5. Poor decision-making
4. Diminished motor skills
3. Relationship troubles
2. Medical problems
1. Mood swings

Lauren Blanks came over yesterday to let me try some of her Weight Watcher favorite foods, and we talked about how one of the things we just can't do to help ourselves lose weight and get healthier is sleep right. She has a monitor that tells her how efficient her sleep is, so it can tell when she's sitting in bed reading, when Brady moved in the bed, when Audrey lost her pacifier, etc.

By definition, moms don't sleep. Which is why we have all of the above 10 signs of sleep deprivation. But there is one I have noticed that, for me, may be more prominent than all the rest, and it wasn't even listed: whacked out dreams. Last night...

I really wanted Wendy's, so I went to the drive thru, only to have the cashier continually ring my order up wrong and keep charging me for crackers, which I didn't order. Maybe it had to do with my car, because then I stole James Franco's truck and almost ran over Tresa Davis. I was speeding over to show choir rehearsal and burst through the door, only to find I was at Nealon Jeffers' house and he wondered why on Earth I was there. Good question: I thought the high school show choir I help with was meeting here today, but I guess not. Silly me. So I'm trying to figure out where show choir was being held, and Wendi Holmes and Lauren Blanks call me to tell me that it starts at five and I'm almost late and I'm going to miss solo tryouts. I say I'm coming and bringing both Anna Schneider and Taylor Clements (two show choir girls who also mistook Nealon's house for our practice space) with me. The leave without me and I stop at Target on the way because Kirby and I have to find our mom. Then all of a sudden Kirby is 4 years old again and he has run away from me in the store and I'm now searching for him and my mom. I find my mom and get yelled at for losing my brother. I find him curled up in a ball by the fitting rooms and we head back into James Franco's truck and try to make it to rehearsal on time to no avail. It's already 5:15 when we leave Target and I'm going to be in trouble with Rodney Bell, our choir director. Luckily I woke up before I got scolded for not being responsible and not getting to my job on time.

In reality, I was just dreaming this while I slept sitting up with Peyton in my arms from about 7-8 this morning, after also being awake with him at midnight, 2:30 and 6.

I may have to write Discovery Health and let them know that detailed dreams that make no sense has got to be their new number one sign of sleep deprivation.

Dude... where's my truck?

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