Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Too Much Sherlock

I'm clearly watching too much of the BBC series "Sherlock", which is fabulous and if you haven't checked it out, you must, immediately, and be amazed at the brilliance. So clever, so witty, and so not cool that there are no more episodes until January. I only have 6 episodes to watch over and over again to tide me over. That, and as I mentioned on Facebook yesterday, my dear Sherlock, Benedict Cumberbatch, is the villain in the new Star Trek movie, so at least there's that. Not that he's that attractive, and he surely won't be as Khan... but oh well.

The point is this: Sherlock has gotten into my subconscious, causing me to dream about things and people that do not interconnect, with me doing daring deeds that I wouldn't do even in wild high school days, and making me so brilliant I just can't stand it.

Exhibit A: last night's dream.

Beginning at Needville High School, I am getting ready to caravan to a summer camp with lots of other friends, and Mr. Janacek (real life principal, in my dream played by Dr. Franklin from "The Hound of Baskerville" episode, so obviously I don't trust him) is telling me to hurry up and that I can't take any carry on luggage in his truck because it will shift and shake and could cause an explosion. I know this to be false and sneak into the office with Megan Allen (high school choir friend) to grab pillows that will aid us in the search for something important. Mr. Janacek leaves without us, trusting when we say we will follow him soon.

In my dream, he is Jennifer Richard's (friend from church) uncle, and she is in on our plot to hold up the chase, so she stalls as Megan and I go investigate Alyson and Eric's (sister-in-law and brother-in-law) apartment. They have complained of dog urine stains, and we have a feeling there's more to this than pet accidents. We magnify and take photographs, scrape carpet fibers, but take longer than we expected, so we have to speed into some downtown Route 66 town in Arizona where we are supposed to be meeting someone who has some clues for us. Luckily, Jennifer is still aiding in the daring escape before the evil landlady came home, so we were in the clear. We are to meet in an old movie theater by a McDonald's, but we walk in and realize that not one but two Chevy Chase (not very funny actor) films are being shown, and we don't know which theater the clues are going to be found in. Luckily, Brandon and my brilliant not even 2-year-old daughter solve the problem for me (the theater on the right) and Brooklyn manages to discover and disarm a bomb that had been placed in a turtle toy.

I know the game is not over, that there are going to be more and more challenges before I will be able to feel safe, but all we can do is wait in a small house until I learn what to do next. I am pretty sure this house is owned by a much older Marilyn Newberry (favorite 16-year-old). Suddenly, I get a text message about sneezing and trains. I am able to translate this to mean that Brandon, Brooklyn and I need to jump onto the moving train behind Marilyn's house as it goes by. All of a sudden Jake Hiebert (ex-boyfriend) calls me and says I have got it all wrong, and the mysterious text actually means we are to derail the train and kill everyone aboard. This is disturbing, as the train is full of Koreans and my friends Emily Felts (friend from church) and Brooke Shipman (college sign language friend) who are living in Korea are on the train with their baby boys. Add to this that I had already thrown Brooklyn onto the train (great mom I am) and I really am not looking forward to this whole derail and kill idea. But still, Jake, Brandon and I run to the switch and change it, just as, once again, genius child Brooklyn jumps into my arms and all the Koreans look sadly at me. I woke up before I knew what really happened.

My dreams had really been calming down lately. No such luck anymore. And I didn't even fall asleep to Sherlock... I fell asleep to Sgt. Bilko. But did I dream of Steve Martin and gambling in the army? No. Not even close. And I know that eating at night enhances dreams, or makes them weirder or more memorable or something...but I can't stop doing that. 4 AM is a prime time to wake up with morning sickness in these parts, so it's turn on a movie and eat fruit snacks for me. So what to do? Entertain you with my insanity, I suppose. Well anyway, if you found this interesting, again, I recommend Sherlock. He's much more clever than I am.
Sherlock Holmes and John Watson. Greatest male heterosexual friendship in the world, besides maybe Bert and Ernie.

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