Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Grandparents

So I'm sitting in College Station hanging out with Brandon's grandmother for the week. Or at least a couple of days. Long story, but basically, his grandad is in the hospital and his grandmother needs someone there with her. You give from what you have, right? Well, I have time, so here I am. The perks of being a stay-at-home-mom: I do what I want. Plus Brandon is busy this week with a tennis tournament and getting licensed or certified or whatever he needs to be a bus driver, so I wasn't going to see much of him anyway. Brooklyn being here is natural medicine for the grandparents (her great grandparents), and it's fun for me to see my daughter being loved on by so many people. I got a lot of that this Labor Day weekend with another set of her great grandparents (Mama and Papa) and all four of her grandparents (Mimi and Pops, Nana and Bebop).

All of this got me thinking: "parent" is a normal word, meaning a close relative of ambiguous gender and the root of all relations that extend beyond ones parent. Brooklyn has two parents. "Grandparent", broken down, is a "parent", or close relation of ambiguous gender, that is also fantastic. Brooklyn has four grandparents. "Great Grandparent", broken down, is a "parent", or close relation of ambiguous gender, that is also fantastic and amazing. Brooklyn has eight great grandparents. That's a lot of studly folks in one family.

I never realized before that we naturally respect our elders by calling them "grand" or both "great" AND "grand" when we call their names. So I've come to these conclusions:

1. We as parents are teaching our daughter disrespect by allowing her to refer to her grandparents not as "Grandmother" and "Grandfather", but rather by calling them four letter words such as "Mimi" and "Nana".

2. We as a society are unoriginal and lacking in wit. Why does everyone's distant relative need the same name? As long as the respect is factored in, why not use synonyms for "great" and "grand". Ex: "My great grandmother" could be easily and with much fun be changed into "My Super Awesomemother" and hold the same meaning.

In conclusion, Brooklyn will now only refer to her grandparents using any combination of the following complimentary terms:
Great
Grand
Awesome
Super
Fantastic
Marvelous
Magnificent
Glorious
Wonderful
Genius
Tremendous
Terrific
By Jove!
Out-of-this-world!
Wicked (but having to be said in a California surfer accent to make sure the respect gets across. Don't want to think any relative is being called a witch!)
Swell
Nifty
Spiffy
Tubular
Rad
Rockin'
Killa (not killer. That would be rude.)
Sweet (again, surfer accent is a necessity in order to relay intent)
Masterful
Scrumtralescent.


Food for thought. Chew on it. And make sure you hug your favorite Scrumtralescent Radparent tonight.

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